Started at the top
Thrown to the bottom
Rose up through the middle
Healing the sorrowful memories from yesteryears
A little child forever inside
With the laughter of a world free and clear of the burdens
For she has seen visions of air
Grace and Faith go hand-in-hand
For her well is never dry
Tears fall from her eyes as if she needed to taste the salt of the sea to be alive
In peaceful silent she sits
Waiting for the ground to shake
Waking those looking for light
Truth she speaks with a flare of amusement…
Music she sees
In movements of words
She is art and all its delights
Won’t you wake for her tonight
A smile she gives
A little giggle
A shy grin
When you meet her lift her up
Give her all she desires
For her soul is also with yours.
In John 10:27 Jesus says, “My sheep listen to my voice; I know them, and they follow me.” There are many voices competing to shape us. There is your own voice, the enemy’s voice, the voice of the world, and the voice of God. His voice is the only one that matters! The creation cannot name itself, only the creator has that right. You have a loving Father who knows exactly who you are and why He made you. Paul writes in 2 Corinthians 10:5, “We take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ,” so ask the Father to identify where the world, the enemy, or even you, have wrongly defined who you are and then replace that lie with truth. Only one voice should define you, the voice of the Father. A good way to determine if a thought does not align with God’s word is to measure it against something that you would say to a friend. You would never tell your friend that they are worthless, that God doesn’t love them, or that they are beyond the Lord’s rescue, so why would you think any of that could be true of you? Through His word, allow God to help you identify and extinguish those lies with the truth of what He thinks about you. No other voice should define you, but that of your Father’s.
I am a temple within God?.
No longer will I endure the torment of an image that is not mine. I am meant for freedoms. The past has left a wake of despair but my moment is in the now. What is done in that moment is what will define my next. I am tired of being scared of love. For I have known the ins and outs of a great love and let me tell you… the pain is so unbearable yet some how I find a sweetness deep within just so I am able to say Im ok. But ok with what,.. being in despair, sorry , but fudging flippiddy that.
Love is not a possession to be had but a gift that is shared by actions that have nothing to do with ourselves. Today I choose to give love to myself , to respect myself, to prove myself to me. If that makes sense.
I’m tired of trying so hard to be someone to someone else and nobody to me.
My promise is with God and that makes me smile. In the now. 😃
I’ve been pondering over the many years of research I have done and why I am still lagging on putting the information in a recognizable order. It would seem as if I am making it harder on myself than it truly needs to be. Why? Self sabotage has kinda been a hinderance in my life. When ever I am really good at something I tend to cause a wrinkle for myself. Am I scared of losing what I am so good-by the hand of someone else…maybe. Or am I chicken shit? hmmm also maybe. As I look at my bookshelf filled with notebooks of my notes and what would seem useless to anyone other than me, holds true gold. Knowledge of me finding myself within a digital age. Years where I didn’t leave the house because I was trying to cypher the inner workings of a passage that caught my eye…. I think I enjoy the Quest itself. Maybe the reason why I am unable or unwilling to write out what I know is fear of someone saying my quest was a waste of time. Thinking this truly hurts my heart. As it would any artist, musician, or author. This is a SHITTY feeling. Wow…. I don’t want to be scared of someone not understanding or not believing what I create. I want to be bold and unashamed of the ideas and thoughts that are constantly rushing through my veins. Thats when I read this passage from Elbert Hubbard’s Scrapbook. He brought me back to a place where for a moment i dont feel so alone.
Keats’ dream of ” a very pleasant life.”
” I had an idea that a Man might pass a very pleasant life in this manner: Let him on a certain day read a certain page of full Posey or distilled Prose, and let him wander with it, and muse upon it, and reflect from it, and dream upon it: until it becomes stale– But when will it do so? Never– When a man/woman has arrived at a certain ripeness in intellect any one grand and spiritual passage serves him as a starting-post towards all the ‘two-and-thirty Palaces’ How happy is such a voyage of conception, what delicious, diligent indolence !”
Keats’ Explained perfectly how I am feeling….that delicious bounce of joy when something hits a sense that causes everything within starts firing rapidly. I waited for this to get stale and fade away, but it has only gotten strong and more focused. This is what It feels like for me when I find some sort of knowledge that interests me. Seeing from all points of view without judgment or fear just following the imagination and what might be left out from what is already known. I start backwards.
So I say again. Maybe My dream is the Quest. The quest of wanting knowledge and answers where others say there is none. What I truly know is, ” I Have a Dream!”