At this very moment, I saw a chain broken and a bond strengthened.
Talking with my mom, being open and honest about how flying back and forth across the country when I was a young girl put into motion a completely unique and different way of viewing the world..
I started the conversation, ” hey, do you remember putting us on a plane when we were so young. How did you get through that? Wasn’t that hard to say goodbye to such small kids.” It must have been emotionally hard for her because I know how hard it would be for me. Yet I still sensed her feeling of relief for getting a break from us for awhile. Which I COMPLETELY understand. (We moms need a break too)
I started explaining to her how it felt, growing up with such strange circumstances and that it might have created in me an unknown perception and rhythm of being.
At first, she would try to identify with me by telling of her own emotions through a similar situation while she was growing up. Playing the woe is me card. (for a minute or two)
I just wanted her to see that maybe she couldn’t know my situation because she didn’t witness these crucial moments which started to take shape in me, but she is still needed and wanted with the acceptance only my mother could give.
I remained calm and patient knowing that this was a sudden moment where the recipe of past actions have led to this very moment of a safe openness.
How was I going to act?!. (I now held the key to change) BUT…., How was I gonna ACT?!.!
I continued to speak in a tone of questioning with a childish bewilderment. Truly wanting her help in solving this riddle of miscommunication between us.
Which we in turn both want to flourish and grow into a loving encouraging source of positive energy within us.
I could feel an authoritative knowledgeable woman speaking from my lips I finally saw/felt a woman of my very own emerge from within. For whom Ive been waiting to get a glimpse of. I was she and she me. A feeling of connection with my self. Knowing I am Okay
In the end of what was a brief discussion while we stood in the kitchen cooking. My mother and I bonded an unseen deep rooted connection.
We weren’t taught or given the correct tools for healing our emotions, so now we must be open and willing to learn. Which we both were.
It was within this time a healing more powerful then energy itself happened. By us connecting the dots of a cycle we no longer want to continue it sparked into motion a driving force of a new foundation of change and growth built on acceptance….
Not just within our relationship but ultimately with how we will now begin to heal others with our new source of Positive Light. All because we started breaking the chains of emotions of which weren’t meant for us to be attached with.
Once this conversation had come to a close, a new freedom was felt within myself. I saw the beginning of event of healing which normally would remain unseen.. Those unhealthy bonds are no longer held together with negative energy but get boosted with a positive, lasting, and pure bond of positive (Love) energy.
Today I feel as if My three year old self got the encouragement and motivations I so deeply wished for. I saw that little girl. Today I was my own angel with the help of my Many Angels. And it all happened in a moment.